This is Katie Ledecky swimming while balancing a full glass of chocolate milk on her head:
When I first saw this video, I thought, “This is exactly what skilled communicators do.”
They share their message (the act of swimming) while staying attuned to their external audience (the glass of milk) — and they make it look easy.
Effective communication is both an internal and external act.
You must articulate your message in a way that’s easily understood and acted on while staying present to how you and your message are being received. And during this process, you need to constantly adjust the content of your message and your delivery based on the feedback from your receiver(s).
This isn’t easy.
That’s why elevating your technical know-how and physical skills (message planning and organization, body language management, vocal delivery, etc.) close to the level of unconscious competence is one of the most valuable things you can do.
What’s unconcious competence?
Unconscious competence is the final of four stages in the Conscious Competence model (a psychological framework that describes the process individuals go through when acquiring a new skill or competency).
Stage 1: Unconscious Incompetence - You’re unaware of your lack of skill or knowledge in a particular area, so you don’t recognize the need for improvement.
Stage 2: Conscious Incompetence - You’re now aware of your lack of skill or knowledge and recognize the need to improve.
Stage 3: Conscious Competence - You’ve acquired the skill or knowledge, but need to consciously think and practice to perform it effectively. You’re competent, but it requires effort and concentration.
Stage 4: Unconscious Competence - You master the skill or knowledge to the point that it becomes second nature. You can perform it effortlessly, without conscious thought.
Katie Ledecky can swim with a full glass of milk on her head because she’s reached the level of unconscious competence in her swimming. She can go through the motions of her stroke while focusing almost entirely on the glass of milk.
An amateur swimmer wouldn’t be able to do this.
Their focus would shift back and forth between swimming and balancing the glass of milk. And as soon as their attention moved away from the milk, it would spill.
How this relates to communication…
I’m not suggesting you can get to a place where you’ll never have to think about what you’re saying (the act of swimming) and can focus entirely on how you and your message are being received (the glass of milk).
But you can learn and apply communication frameworks, principles, and approaches that allow you to focus less on what you’re saying and how you’re saying it and more on how you and your message are being received.
That’s the goal, isn’t it?
Your listener(s) determine the significance of your message, not you.
So, wouldn’t it make sense to figure out how to be more present to them and spend less energy thinking about what to say and how to say it?
Here are three examples to help clarify:
Imagine you’re asked to give a presentation. If you don’t know how to set clear presentation objectives and have the ability and confidence to talk candidly through a set structure, you’ll resort to writing a script. Then, when you deliver your scripted presentation, all of your attention will go to recalling your script instead of being present to your audience.
Imagine you’re put on the spot in a meeting to give a project update. If you don’t understand how to structure information logically and have a messaging framework you can populate your information into, you’ll likely start talking without knowing where you’re going. All of your attention will go to thinking about what to say, leaving little to no attention to consider what the information means to the others in the meeting and how to frame it so it’s actionable.
Imagine you’re meeting with someone to share difficult news. If you aren’t practiced and confident in your ability to manage your body language and vocal delivery to be congruent with your words and create the outcome you want, all your attention will be focused on getting your delivery “right” (which is often sensed by your receiver and feels disingenuous) instead of being “with” your receiver as they take in and process the news.
This is what communication skills training and coaching are all about.
Helping you elevate your technical know-how and physical skills closer to the level of unconscious competence so you can pay more attention to how you and your message are being received.
Effective communicators:
Know what aspects of their body language and vocal delivery they can control and are practiced in controlling them to meet the unique demands of the moment.
Appreciate the power of their word choices and wield that power with great consideration and care.
Understand how information hierarchy impacts message perception and understanding.
Are aware of, have practice with, and are confident in applying various messaging techniques and frameworks.
Can sense, name, and understand their own feelings so they don’t influence the content or delivery of their message without their permission.
All of these things can be learned, practiced, and developed close to the point of unconscious competence.
What stage of the competency model are you at with each of them?
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Thanks for reading!
Jenny